Acceptable Fast Food Stops

I’m not a big fan of major fast food chains in general. I will eat something if others want to eat there too, but for the most part I’m choosing a mom and pop burger joint or a soul food place for chicken. Most good places for Mexican food don’t have a drive through and their tacos don’t have hard shells, and the topic of Weinershnitzel only comes up when I need to induce diarrhea. Pizza kind of falls into this category too, I won’t order from a big chain because their pizza is usually terrible. However, even when forced to partake in these crapshoots there is a hierarchy to what I’m willing to settle for when we have no other options because everything else is closed

1) Subway – I don’t consider this fast food, but many people do. They have more locations now than McDs AND this is one of the few places you can have some actual veggies. Plus, if you know where to look, you can find a 24 hour one

2) McDonald’s – Locations are great, but you lose points for creating food that DOESN’T biodegrade.

3) Carl’s Jr. – You lose points for location, plus I can never get anything small there. Not to mention the fact that your fries ALWAYS taste like they were made for a customer much earlier than I

4) Taco Bell – Giving me guaranteed mudbutt (different from diarrhea) can be forgiven when you put some sour cream on that mess

5) Burger King/Wendy’s – You find me one that’s open past midnight and close by, we can do this

6) Del Taco – If I’m agreeing to Del Taco, I MUST be drunk! However, if I only agreed to eat your fries and maybe a quesadilla…well, I just went along for the ride.

7) Jack In The Box – I’m never drunk enough, or in desperate enough need for Jack while there is something better close by. The only reason I even allowed Jack to be on this list, is because their commercials are much more appealing than their food.

Well, that’s my list. Other restaurants may be in question, but as far as drive through and quick after midnight, this is what I have. Now let’s all get drunk and get some hard shell Del Taco Tacos with cheddar and crinkle cut fries!! You’re buying.