I Can’t Be Superman

There was a long stretch of my life where I wanted to be Superman. I wanted to be the guy every single person could count on. I had to be; to a fault. I had friends who told me that this was a bad thing. They noticed how I helped everyone and those people would go back to their loved ones and be happy. I could fix things. I did it. I became Superman.

I was the guy that people came to, called out to, sought, in their time of need. I was always the guy who would fix the problem. I always had the solution. There would be a girl I liked, who needed a ride or someone to fix her car and I would do it. She’d thank me, and go to her guy and say what a hero I was. I even had a few of those guys jealous. Even my own friends would get jealous. My guy friends would seek my help for themselves, but if I helped their girl, I was muscling in. I did this for years.

One day, at work, I met a girl who was having a tough time. She was in a terrible relationship and didn’t feel like she deserved much better. She thought the guy who was verbal abusive, neglectful and manipulative, was the guy she deserved. She didn’t have the highest self esteem. As a matter of fact, it was this idea of mine that made her finally open her eyes. I told her, “You know, who you date, reflects what you think about yourself.” I thought she could do better. Being that I was still stuck as Superman, I didn’t think I was the guy for her, but someone was.

She talked to me, opened up to me, sought my help, but stayed where she was. It was less scary than trying to find someone else to love her. She slipped up and the guy found out about me. About Superman trying to save her. He tore her away from me. It was as I expected my life to be. I acted like Superman, and she went back to the guy. I kept flying around saving people. I wondered what happened to her. I had an idea that she had kids and was as happy as she was going to allow herself to be.

One day, she came back into my life. She found me! She gave me her number and we started dating right away. There were still problems in her life. She was still letting people hurt her. However, now…now she had Superman by her side. I help her and she helps me. I save her, I protect her, I love her, I married her. Now I realize that in marrying her, I was admitting I was wrong. I wasn’t destined to be Superman. Flying around, saving people and having them return to their other half. No, instead, I was HER superhero. Just hers. I save her, she saves me and we live happily ever after.